November 1, 2025

Well, I'm checking in. For years, myeloma blogs were such a big part of my life and I "met" some awesome people. I find it helpful to write. I should do it more. It's cathartic and sometimes you figure things out when you take the time to write down your thoughts. So, an update. Tim is doing really well. He is over 18.5 years out from diagnosis. He is taking another chemo break, which is something we didn't think he was going to be able to do again. He was on Dara as a single agent, then Pomalyst was added every other day. But, he worries about the effects of the drugs on his body long term. I can't say I don't worry as well. So, he decided to give his body a rest. He has no m-spike and his markers all look fine. His doctor is being very cautious and will do bone marrow MRI's to make sure nothing sinister is happening despite the low markers. We have 5 myeloma specialists in our practice and I think they just hired a 6th. The younger doctors are not OK with chemo vacations. They don't like taking the risk of bone damage cropping up even when labs look good. I get it. It happens and the results can be very damaging to a patient's quality of life. But, Tim knows the risks and his disease does not behave the way myeloma usually does. He wants to take advantage of that. And, since I have respect for his right to call the shots, and I also know folks who died from years of taking chemo, I support his decision. It's nice to have a bit of normalcy in our lives and not make multiple trips to the cancer center every month. I just have to be careful to only book his appointments with his regular doctor or we will hear a lot of fire and brimstone from the others. They will never be on board with this decision. Our daughter found a new job since I last wrote. Thank goodness. The company she worked for before this was awful and she was so overworked and stressed out, it was getting us worried. She lost weight, had tension headaches. It was baaaad. Ironically, she now works for a company that does marketing for medical conferences and there's times when I know the myeloma doctors speaking because they are blood cancer conferences. She likes that she is somehow involved in helping the cause. Her roommates both moved in with their boyfriends so she had to move into her own place. Luckily she found a place just 2 blocks from the beach and we moved her in this past May. She's not crazy about living alone but I think she's getting used to it. She loves living by the ocean. We miss her but it's only 70 miles away so we do see her from time to time. We just went down with the dog, a week ago, and walked the beach and boardwalk with Liv. Asbury Park is the most dog friendly place I have ever seen. They're everywhere. And, thank goodness for facetime when you're empty nesting. It's so helpful when you're missing someone. She will be home for Thanksgiving and Christmas, which is great. We are fighting our dog's cancer again right now. She had surgery 2+ years ago and, sadly, it recurred. A soft tissue tumor in her leg. So she goes for surgery again on Friday. She will be our last dog. I will hate not having a dog in our home but the vet costs and the heartache when they get sick and die is just too much for me. I love this doggie so much. We are all gonna be distraught when she goes. I can't do it again. And she's soooooo good. We take her everywhere we go on vacation. She never messes indoors or barks or chews. I know we will never get a dog this good again and I don't want to be limited on going away because of a pet. It's not easy to find pet-friendly places last minute and we don't plan vacations very far in advance. It is coming up on 5 years since we lost my dad to cancer. I cannot believe it has been that long. It's scary how fast the time zooms by. My mom is doing OK in assisted living. Her short term memory is really bad but she's hanging in there. So, looming in the near future is having to decide what to do about Tim collecting social security. He becomes eligable for it in Feb. They say to collect early if you are sick. But, he still wants to work so we will be "docked" quite a bit of his benefits due to his income. I went to a free seminar at a local library last week but, it turns out the woman gave incorrect information about social security. I think her main goal was to find new customers to sell annuities to. She called me the other night, gave me even more incorrect info about SS and lost interest in me as soon as she realized I was not interested in buying annuities. I guess it's time to call Soc. Sec. directly. I have to figure this out. I'm always fearful I'm going to make a financial mistake that can't be fixed later. I've felt that way ever since Tim was diagnosed. It doesn't help that we have lost a fair bit of money because of things I didn't know. It sucks but there's no going back. Tim's body is not going to be able to keep doing what he does for much longer. He's always in pain, has arthritis, disc degeneration, some neck issues, and a torn meniscus now. The truth is, it would probably be better for us if he went out on permanent disability instead of retiring. He would get his full SS benefit, instead of 70%, get medicare sooner, and he isn't even supposed to be lifting heavy items with his MM. He lifts a machine that weighs over 250 pounds (with our employee). But, he is adamant about working as long as he can. He thinks he will worsen physically and mentally if he stops. I can't argue with him. It's his decision. I just hate worrying about money. We live in a high cost of living area. It's not going to be easy to retire here and he said he is NOT moving. One day at a time, Denise, one day at a time. But, you don't get to avoid planning ahead when it comes to finincial issues. We will have to make a decision soon. So, bring on fall and the holiday season. To anyone reading, wishing you health and happiness. Our holidays look very different these days but, it's OK. Even when it's just the 3 of us celebrating at home, I'm with my favorite people in the world and I feel blessed. Cheers!