I don't think I have another puppy rescue in me

Well, I have to say that I love my new doggie but I think she is trying to kill me. I blew out my back a few weeks ago and it is still not 100%. By last week, it was just getting back to normal when Lacey shot out the back door and made a break for it. I live on a busy road and her best doggie friend lives across that busy road. We have a fenced-in yard but the driveway goes into the back yard and so the gate on that side of the house stays open so we can get our cars in and out. Of course, she ran right for the driveway. If it were not for the fact that she caught a scent and hesitated, she'd probably be in doggie heaven right now. I still had to dive down and scoop her up thereby re-injuring my back. I came back in the house walking like the hunchback of Notre Dame and cussing her out. By today, my back felt pretty good. I had to pull youth group
duty at church today and even took part in the relay race with the kids. Then we took the dog for a walk and stopped at our rental house where Tim was doing the leaves and Olivia was throwing a stick for the dog and the leash slipped out of her hands. She and I started chasing after the dog in the front yard while the dog was cutting and running like crazy. The neighbor I had been talking to stayed by the sidewalk playing zone defense in case she went for the street. This road is nearly as busy as mine and there is a bend in it before our rental house. If we didn't catch her quick, she'd be a goner. So I made a leap and threw myself out towards the dog in a full body slam position missing the quick little "pain in the butt" but landing on the leash and slowing it just enough for me to grab it. So, needless to say, the old back could have done without that tackle. My brand new pants now have grass stains on the knees. I was so worked up I told Olivia that mistakes like that CAN'T happen and if she can't handle this dog and she gets killed, we won't be getting another. And if Tim says, "YOU wanted a dog" to me one more time, I'm gonna tackle his ass too. I am just too darn old for this.

They're driving me CRAZY

Well, it's another one of those times when I feel like taking off for a vacation all by myself before I completely lose my mind. I have never done this, by the way, hence the mind left long ago, no
forwarding address. The not-so-subtle hints to my husband and child that they really have to
stop dropping things in my lap that they are capable of and/or responsible for have failed miserably. All efforts to clone me 2 or 3 times so I could spread my duties out amongst several Denises have (been vetoed by those who know me) failed so today, in a last ditch effort
to make my housemates think and do for themselves, I have posted the following sign in a prominent place in the kitchen.




OPERATION INDEPENDENCE

Our new policy, beginning 11/1/2010, is to try to handle tasks ON YOUR OWN before asking MOM/WIFE to do it for you. If you have made an honest attempt to do something and find that you need help, then you can ask for her assistance. All efforts to help Mom/Wife keep her sanity intact(what's left of it) are greatly appreciated!!!

THANK YOU!!!

I don't know how much responsibility you can heap onto someone before they go completely bonkers but I think I have come frighteningly close to finding out these last few years.
I am tired, over-worked, under-appreciated and must be speaking in tongues as nothing I say seems to get through to anyone around here. I'll bet Wisconsin is nice this time of year.

Cuckoo for cocoa puffs

I have been walking a lot with my puppy and I have to ask, is it just me or is it a little weird when strangers let someone else's dog lick their entire face? Now don't get me wrong, I've been
sportin' "eau de puppy breath" ever since we brought this crazy girl home. She can't hold her licker(get it? liquor). But she's mine. Kinda like you don't mind changing your kids' diaper(most of the time) but you get a little gaggy changing some other kid's. And, even if I
do say so myself, this dog has got a WHOLE DARN LOT of that cute thing going on. We can't
go anywhere with her without being stopped constantly for folks to meet her but yesterday,
I walked her to the post office. I live just a block from our little town center. This
pretty woman all dressed up in a black pantsuit, make-up on, hair done and all, bends down to meet
Lacey and is going on about how cute she is and proceeds to let my dog give her a complete face wash with her tongue. I don't mind a little puppy kiss from a strange dog but you don't know how many people have let Lacey just kiss the bejeezus out of their whole FACE. And I am thinking to myself, you have no idea, crazy person, how many times my dog sniffs out the rabbit
poops in my yard(I call them cocoa puffs, like the cereal) and eats them. I know there is that saying that their mouths are probably cleaner than a human's but I see what that doggie does
everyday, I'm thinking not.

What in the world is going on in Jersey

I'm telling you, there is just way too much stress in this state. The other day, a guy that works
for the same company my dad works for, shot and killed his 2 little kids and himself at his mother's house.
Of course, the next thing you always hear is that he was going through a divorce. WHY WHY WHY do they take the kids with them? If you can't stand to go on, go out into the woods and do what you gotta do. Why kill the kids? Unfortunately, the answer to this usually is that they know this is
the way to get back at their wife. Nothing will hurt her more than killing her kids. We had this same thing happen just a few years ago in a town right next to us. Then yesterday, a police officer we know came to our house on the police harley davidson. We know
several guys on the force and Tim has done wood floors for a few and the chief. I'm always wondering what the neighbors think when cops stop by here but most know us and the new ones
next door were out later and I mentioned it was a social call. Actually it was not but I didn't want to say why until it hits the papers and is general knowledge(which will be today). Seems a port authority police officer who lived a few blocks away from us killed himself in his
home at 4 am yesterday. The port authority is having the house dealt with and they asked the local cops if they knew a wood floor guy to replace and re-finish the floors they were cutting out.
They said they did and came right over here. My husband had to go to the scene last night to take measurements and see what had to be done. He came home a bit bummed after seeing the family photos on the wall. Seems this guy did this with his 7 year old kid in the home. The little boy went up to a cop we know and asked him if they were going to be able to fix his daddy. Ya know, I can't say I have ever been in the type of depression that you hear about where people just can't go on. I don't know what this guy was dealing with but really, did you have to do this to your boy?! I have probably mentioned before that Tim knows a guy that he was friends with in high school that is drinking and drugging himself to death. Another was having marital problems and wound up hospitalized twice with what appeared to be suicide attempts. My brother-in-law's brother-in-law killed himself a few years back this time of year over a job problem. It makes me mad when my husband is sick and wants to live and all these people are throwing their lives away. Life is precious. I certainly understand when people have horrible, painful diseases and can't bear it anymore. And I know I can't fathom the kinds of problems some have dealt with. I know I have dealt with and am dealing with a certain amount of depression with our situation. How can I not? I still have plenty of moments where it hits me like a ton of bricks that my husband has cancer. The thought of losing him makes my blood run cold. BUT, especially when you have kids, you go on. Even if you don't want to, and believe me, if something happens to Tim, I know I would be lost, but I would put one foot in front of the other for my kid. I would do what I have to do to try to give her the best life possible despite getting a pretty raw deal. Though I certainly feel empathy for someone who is so lost that they take their own life but when it involves kids, and they kill the poor kids, I get pretty darn pi**ed off. Is there anything more selfish than that? There was a woman on Oprah a few years ago who begged a judge not to give her ex-husband unsupervised visitation with their kids as he had threatened to kill them. The judge refused to listen to her. Her ex killed all three of their sons. How this woman goes on, I just don't know. This world is a screwed up place. Somedays, I wanna go live on an island with no one else around. It's just too much to see all that is going on around us some days. Whack jobs like this enjoy good health while my husband gets cancer. My husband is trying to live to raise our daughter and these idiots just chuck it all and kill their innocent kids or destroy their lives in the process. Doesn't seem fair, most of all to those poor kids.

Oh my aching back

So here's a helpful hint for anyone with a bad back. NEVER cough while you are bent over. I made that mistake this morning while I was getting recyclables ready to go out and threw out my
back in a BIG way. Been in agony ever since. Can't even tolerate a 12 pound puppy pulling on the
leash, it's so bad. I am a cough-o-holic due to some weird, chronic sinus condition and it's no fun coughing when the back is already blown out either. It's always something around here. I tried
strolling to the bank today. Between the back and the inflamed nerves in my foot, I looked like
a little old lady. Feel like one too, dag-nabit! On a brighter note, Livvy got her first goal ever
in soccer and they won their first game on Sat. YEAH!!! Last year, she started playing soccer and wound up on the worst team in the league with girls who just were not into it and refused to run
and break a sweat(why their parents sign them up is beyond me). Our team got creamed the whole season and in the last game, the opposing coach, who knew we got killed in every game,
chose to cheat in the last game of the year. I called the soccer board. This man had already been banned from coaching several things. He now is banned from coaching soccer. I hate cheaters and coaches who can't control their egos. Olivia had a bunch of "assists" last year and this season too but never scored a goal. This year, our team is a little better. The coach is much better also. We are still probably the weaker team in the league but our losses have been only by a goal or 2. This past game, Olivia made a super goal and they won. Thank goodness.

No accounting for taste

Tonight, I had some chopmeat out to make dinner. I have had it with cooking for a long time. My kid hates everything 'cept pasta and ice cream. She usually complains about what I'm making while I am still cooking it. I've seen her say she doesn't like something before her taste buds have even had a chance to register. All her life, she has stopped eating foods that she used to like but never really adds any foods to her repetoire so she is just ridiculous to cook for and my days of making 2 or 3 meals every night to please everyone are over. Now, I could eat pasta every day but Tim is not a pasta fan. I have IBS
and a laundry list of food sensitivities. None of us eat seafood. I used to, just not in a long time.
I prefer not to eat pork though I can't resist putting crumbled up bacon on my potato salad. Tim is now starting with some weird allergies that are making him wheeze. He thinks peanuts are one culprit. Just great. When you put all our can't eats and won't eats together, it's a long list. We have been getting take-out(everyone can order whatever they want)
sometimes 2-3 times a week but it gets pretty pricey. We had hamburgers recently and I was
not in the mood for meatloaf. Had that a week or so ago too. So, what to do? I take out a package of spanish rice and start that going. I brown up some chopmeat and add chili seasoning to it. I grate up some cheddar cheese. I figure this is a little like a hamburger helper /taco salad type of thing. I mix up the seasoned beef with the spanish rice, plate it and put cheddar on top
and top that off with salsa and some tortilla strips(I have to admit this was a little pouch from Wendys that was never used). I eat it. Well, I think, not so bad. By the time I'm finishing, it's tasting pretty bland and I'm thinking, I'm never making this again. For one thing, it's gotta have about a billion calories. For
another, I'm already retaining water. There's so much salt in this dish(I did not add any) that I'm gonna look 3 months pregnant by morning and lastly, I'm wondering if I can get through my
dog's walk tonight without jogging home to the loo. You think that's funny? You try jogging with a 4 month old puppy who doesn't know to stay on one side so she shoots back and forth in front of you and then stops on a dime 'cause she smelled something. I've done it. Very
difficult. So I figure, that was a dud, and then Olivia chimes up and says, "I LOVE THIS. THIS
STUFF IS GREAT!" Tim then says he really likes it too. My poor family. I guess it's been such slim pickens around here palate-wise, they think this pathetic excuse for dinner was just terrific. Go figure. If I ever hit the lottery, the first thing I'd do is hire a chef. Oh and a masseuse. Oh yeah and a housekeeper. And don't forget a grounds keeper. And a personal trainer. A yoga teacher. And definitely a psychotherapist, I really need one of them. Wait and a carpenter to finish my house. Oh well. Back to the real world. Off to walk the puppy.

A word on the news story out of NJ

I'm pretty sure it has become national news about the college boy who committed suicide after
2 other college kids put a webcam in his room and aired a homosexual encounter on the internet. This kid was from a town that is just a 3 or 4 mile drive from us. There has been a big movement going on to try to stop gay kids from committing suicide with celebrities posting you tube messages and such. The parents of this boy are getting a lot of support from their community and their son's former high school classmates and friends though I'm sure they just want their kid back. It is so incomprehensible to think of what goes through the mind of someone who laughs while they are destroying someone's life. I just can't understand the cruelty and lack of empathy. I hope that the two people responsible for this are punished severely and it stands
as a warning to others who might think of doing something as depraved as this. Our pastor gave a sermon about this 2 Sundays ago.
Ironically, he based his sermon on something I said to him at bible class. Though our division of the Lutheran Church stands with what the bible says about homosexuality being wrong, he
felt he had to speak out against what was done to this poor guy. It is my own personal opinion that homosexuality is not a choice. I believe people are born that way and they are a child of God no matter what. I don't agree with people judging others for their sexual preference because it is none of their business and the bible also makes it VERY clear that we are in no position to judge ANYBODY. It is God's place to decide what's right or wrong, not ours. It is not OK to play God and go around deciding for yourself who is a sinner or not. We all are. And who's to say that God hasn't changed his original stance on the subject anyway? He is creating these people just like he created you and me, after all. Maybe this is all part of teaching us a lesson in tolerance of differences in people. We have several gay couples living in our neighborhood. They are wonderful folks and great neighbors and though there are a few straight folks we wouldn't mind seeing move out of here, nobody has any problem with our gay friends. There was an attack in NYC on several gay people last week that was just brutal. I read in the paper that one person involved was seen torturing a cat recently in front of friends who were all cheering. Some kids today grow up so desensitized to violence and cruelty that they have no feelings for even the most innocent and vulnerable of God's creatures. It makes me sick to hear about these things. Until this country gets serious about throwing the book at people like this, getting rid of the loopholes that let criminals off the hook, and putting people away and KEEPING them locked up, the quality of life in this country will continue to fall. Our judicial system is a joke and it is the main reason behind the high crime rates in this country. Pedophiles, rapists, and murderers are let out of prison to live amongst us and stalk their prey over and over again. Or they never go to prison in the first place because this country has so many rights protecting the guilty that the innocent get screwed. I don't get it, why is a dangerous criminal entitled to be let out on bail? Why do people who murder someone get a second chance after 12 years? It's not like the person who is dead gets a do-over. Why do people who torture/kill animals get off so easily? Getting back to what happened here at Rutgers College, all this anti-bullying stuff in schools isn't doing a darn thing. Bullying has gotten worse because of the internet and cell phones. A bully can humiliate someone in a public way reaching so many people just by tapping a few computer keys never having to ever say anything to anyone's face. It is the ultimate cowardly act. I'm sure this young man who killed himself realized how very hard it would be to live this down. Aside from changing his identity and appearance and moving away somewhere where nobody knew him before, how would he get away from something that was put out to the whole world? Kids are just as cruel as ever if not more. Are parents talking to their kids about how wrong it is to be mean? I have talked to Olivia over and over again about such things and she has been severely punished just for being rude to another child some years ago. We need to get a whole lot tougher on bullying and crime in general. We can't have kids getting bullied in school and seeing their lives destroyed without severe punishment for those responsible in hopes of deterring all bullies in the future. Bullies should be suspended the first time and expelled if it continues. Maybe mom and dad will get serious about getting their brat under control when they have to pay a tutor because "Junior" was tossed out of school. Until there are real consequences for bad behavior, it will just continue. When we see the news and someone is murdered, maybe a child was abducted, violated and killed, it is NEVER done by a first time offender. It is always someone with a history that has gotten away with their horrible acts before. Wake up America! Streamline and fix the judicial system. Build prisons and stop making the rest of us live amongst these
whack jobs! It's time this country starts "throwing away the key".